It has been quite a while now since I’ve posted on here.
Partly because of my changing house and also somebody asked me on why should I post about my life, my thoughts on the public access place? Shouldn’t the blog be just something in particular topic? So, I had a think about it.
Then, my conclusion is this:
I don’t have to do what people expect me to do. I should write whatever I feel like to. So, I decided to come back and keep posting as I wish.
I have indeed, moved a place to stay. I am now staying with ( I don’t know whether I’ve mentioned about him but I am going to anyway). I am staying with a guy called “geoff”, he used to be my mobility trainer when I was at boarding school years ago. He’s partially sighted himself though he never liked to admit it since recently.
He’s old (age wise) about 55 and has a ridiculous relationship with a thai girl who is 33, anyway, their relationship is nothing to me or shall I say, nothing that I should get involve.
I do understand after all that nobody is perfect but here it is…
He’s old, live on various sorts of benefits and that include housing benefit. He used to work as “social worker” sort of like… helping blind and partially sighted people get along with their lives which is… sort of good.
However, he has many habits that I do not like and can’t stand….
He talks a lot! And I mean a lot! He always make other people think that he’s kind, nice and clever.
I’m staying with him, of course I do cook for him to be something in exchange but it is a lot of pressure you see?
Firstly, he asked for 100 pounds from me to stay with him that is to contribute to bills and food. However, he will make me feel guilty if I didn’t give him some more. He has such a habit of making me feel guilty by stating that how difficult for him of not having money and he has to live his life in a very tight and wise with spending his own money. As to these benefits that he’s get, he will in every month send nearly 200 pounds to his thai girlfriend by saying that he’s more than happy to help her. Has he forgotten something here? Sending her some money, of course it’s nice but what is the flipping point of sending money to other people and starving yourself? I don’t really understand.
Then, he would treat himself (that’s what he call it anyway) by buying books and DVDs which of course none of my business at all, if he likes to read books then go ahead, if he enjoys watching dvds then please do but not telling me all these and adding that you short of money so and so. If he hasn’t got much money then I do understand but please please do not make me feel guilty and ask more from me. I’m very disappointed with him since he’s an old man but acting so childish.
Secondly, he loves to see himself better than others, good and being very helpful. I do admit that he’s nice and helpful but it’s not just that you see? He will help you but keep reminding you on how helpful he is to you, how kind he is to do so and so. Yes, he let me stay in but then I paid for it. However, he will keep telling other people that he let me stay in for free because he’s nice person. As to this, if you’re really kind of good person, like to help others, you wouldn’t actually go around and telling other in word on how nice you are, would you? Well, I wouldn’t. Him of course, helped me but asked a lot for return. He assumed that if he goes to Thailand he can go with me for free, he doesn’t need to pay any penny while he’s in Thailand. But it’s not that. Is he missing something here? I am yes, stayed or in fact, staying with him but I paid money for god sake. But what does he want? Go to Thailand and let me pay everything. Ah yes, to live in Thailand is cheaper than in UK but still money and surely by thai standard we wouldn’t call it cheap! If we have to double up everything. I am not prepare to pay domestic flight for him and myself and I am not prepare to buy him every meals but he doesn’t seem to get that.
He, himself, likes to think that he is cleverer and knows everything. Once, we were talking about Thailand, he said that from Bangkok to Had yai is only 400 something kilometers which I corrected him but he said he’s right. Basically, Had Yai is one of the main city down the south of Thailand where my mum lives and I have to go and see her every time that I go back. It’s about 1 hour and 20 minutes to fly from Bangkok. So, he just to show his many knowledges telling me that “plane flies 500 kilometres per hour” (which of course not true) So, I said it can’t have been because by driving from Bangkok to Khon Kaen (a city to the north east where I used to live) takes 6 hours and a half on a highway and flight takes 45 minutes. But to Had yai it takes 12 hours to drive and 1,20 with flight. So, he didn’t believe me but saying well it’s not that far to drive. So, I just went quiet and thought not to argue, not worth it. I mean, who is he to argue with the origin people? I for heaven sake, was born in Thailand, grew up in Thailand, go back to Thailand once a year, been living both city and within Bangkok itself and who is he? English, stupid old git.
Another time that he tried to show of on how much he know everything. He’s been telling what to do with my desertation which ah… I am doing law degree but he finished his sociology degree since I wasn’t born. Or once, he wanted some songs from my laptop so I coppied them on to my memory stick, just to make files smaller I asked him whether on his machine has winzip or winrar so I could zip those files then I can give him more. He told me cleverly that he has window! And that can make music play on his laptop… ah well… very clever ha!
See? He doesn’t want to admit that he doesn’t know things, he likes to show that he knows everything, thai cultures, Indian cultures, Japanese culture, Buddhism, Christianity and many more.
Surely, no one knows that much, it must be something that as a human beings who do not have huge brain and do not have long life to experience every single things…. Must have been something that we do not know of.
Thirdly, he loves criticizing others. This fact is so annoying.
Yes, he always says that he feels as if he doesn’t belong to England, he likes Thailand by adding many complimentaries like Thailand is so beautiful, nice, thai people are kind, they have warm smile so and so. Though to those points, he never stopped criticized my cultures or even other people cultures.
He said that thai music (modern one) are not good, they do not know how to play guitar, drums, do not know how to sing etc. but really, who is he to judge other people? He said of course, that he can play better than them. Well, I do admit that not every thai bands are good but some of them are brilliant as the same as English bands, some of them are just rubbish and some of them are really good. So, who is he to analyse, criticize and give such a judgmental to other people’s way of lives?
Look at himself, I mean.
Well, but who am I here to criticize him anyway. I am so sorry but if he hasn’t tried to interfere my life, hasn’t tried to patronizing me, hasn’t tried to tell me what to do, hasn’t tried to tell me on what my mum needs or needn’t, hasn’t tried to show that knows my mum better than myself (he never met her and no! not even ever talked to her), hasn’t tried to make me feel guilty… I wouldn’t be sitting here and writing about what do I feel towards him.
Frankly, I feel sorry for him, he has no friends, no real love and lack of mature attitudes. Nevertheless, he’s too old to be lifted up.
But I’ll do my best just to listen and listen.
There are actually a lot more about him but I shall say no more…
